Hey everyone!

I'm the happiest bunnycat, Jeff just passed the FSOs and we're off to Davao next week for a big breather cause I'm enrolling in Research Methods already next semester. I'm growing up! :)

there were afternoons spent somewhere thinking of someplaces/elsewheres/what might have beens -- and it was you, always you and you. sometimes i am overwhelmed by these unravelling threads we forever left hanging. a thousand ruts to choose from, why do i still choose the most familiar? let's have an eternal cup of coffee sometime, we always started and ended there, i want to look at your face and read new lines and old hurts, then watch as you do the same. i will never forget you.  are you still the same? i knew you so well. 

finally! some pretty good vibes coming my way, i'm back to school in june! up dharma, up! i swear, its been a massive load off my mind, what with work, the exams and everything else i'm stressing about, my boss allowed me to enroll in migration studies. fame and fortune here i come! plus, the schedules great, 8 am to 2 pm on saturdays so i don't have to pass out from the long hard commute on weekdays; plus i get to have a life after school. and still manage to work on sundays (yes, i work on weekends and holidays).

also, if the universe is still feeling fine and altruistic, i might go to italy for my birthday! (i'll be 25 and i'm theres no way to go but up and away.) I promised myself i'm never taking leaves so i can go on that much delayed trip with my tita. :) and, i might also go to davao with jeffcat in october. i'm keeping my fingers and toes crossed.

this weekend has been a breather. mm, scratch that, more like one drawn out exhalation of relief, really. work's always crazy-hyper, i'm on perpetual overtime (which means i barely sleep or get to do things for myself) but the people are good and i like what i'm doing, i mean hey, some people got it worse than i do. some cash in my pocket, some love from my baby/cat, some good vibing, everything will be alright. watch this space. peace out people, hope the love makes its way to you. :)

hi ho, i'm at the airport suffocating at the tinderbox, off to davao for the holy week, by this time tomorrow i'll be at the beach i swear. had to rush from work earlier to get my ass to the airport in time only to find out that my flight was cancelled. so i'm here, blogging while waiting for the next one while the world whirls around me.

not complaining, the swirling's nice. up karma, up. in the meantime, listen to this.

Cross the street from your storefront cemetery
Hear me hailing from inside and realize I

I am the conscience clear
In pain or ecstasy
And we were all weaned my dear
Upon the same fatigue

You're staring at the sun
(Oh my own voice cannot save me now)
Standing in the sea
(It's just one more breath and then I go down)

Your mouth is open wide
The lover is inside
And all the tumults done
Collided with the sign
You're staring at the sun
You're standing in the sea
Your body's over me

Note the trees because
The dirt is temporary
More to mine than fact face
Name and monetary

Beat the skins and let the
Loose lips kiss you clean
Quietly pour out like light
Like light, like answering the sun

You're staring at the sun
You're standing in the sea
Your mouth is open wide
You're trying hard to breathe
The water's at your neck
There's lightning in your teeth
Your body's over me

You're staring at the sun
You're standing in the sea

Dissolved Girl
Massive Attack:

Shame
Such a shame
I think I kind of lost myself again

Day
Yesterday
Really should be leaving but I'll stay

Say
Say my name
I need a little love to ease the pain

Its easy to remember when it came
Cause  it feels like I've been
I've been here before
And you're not my savior
But I still don't go
Feels like something that I've done before
I could fake it but I still want more

Fade
Made to fade
Passions overrated anyway

Say
Say my name
I need a little love to ease the pain

Its easy to remember when it came
Cause  it feels like I've been
I've been here before
And you're not my savior
But I still don't go
Feels like something that I've done before
I could fake it but I still want more

i can name five other people who are in the same straits as i am; and we're all having coffee later. i've been annoying myself singing Mercedez Benz, but i can't relate that well since i got a colored tv. want to fast forward my life to where i'm 30 and stable, being in between anything sucks big time cause i'm doing nothing but hoping. feel like some wannabe actress/waitress waiting for her big break into hollywood.

christmas is overrated. just an excuse to stress and hustle.

rock my world 2009. much love for 2008.

best cover of a pink floyd song:

Wish You Were Here
Rasputina

So, so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell, blue skies from pain.
Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail? A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?

And did they get you to trade your heroes for ghosts? Hot ashes for trees?
Hot air for a cool breeze? Cold comfort for change?
And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?

How I wish, how I wish you were here.
We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year,
Running over the same old ground. How we found the same old fears.
Wish you were here.

How I wish, how I wish you were here.
We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year,
Running over the same old ground. How we found the same old fears.
Wish you were here.

watch this space. i'll be coming up with my best and worst list of the year pretty soon. peace out. (take me to the beach)

i came from lunch today. as usual, i was wearing the wrong outfit for the weather, my raise-my-spirits sundress was well, rained upon. it was still raining hard, and when i got out Box O'Rice i found myself in a existentialist dilemma. shades of me being a drama queen, but i couldn't cross the street cause the floodwaters were rising (read my entry about the libertad deluge).

stopped and stared for a while pondering my options, do i bravely cross the waters or walk to the kanto (flood's at its lowest point here) cross the street, and cut on the sidewalks to Xocolat? took the second option, i'm here at Xocolat, and so much for existentialist ponderings.

and, as it turns out, my sweet, pretty Catherine, dear readers, is a boy. yes, you heard me. a siamese boycat. i don't know how or why jeff and i could  have missed the obvious for the 4 months he's been with us, but by early afternoon last saturday, he had tiny balls to show for it so we're calling him Santino for the moment. the deal is: i can name him anything i want as long as he responds to it. Kung Fu, for example. or Sleeky. Or Lazy. Amihan and Kapayapaan aren't really options, but i admit, i got bummed out when i found out he was a boy.

i mean its like finding out there's no santa, hell, i was singing to "her" my "prettiest cat in the world song" and wanting to buy dresses and getting into arguments with jeff about how outfits are "frivolous", and he, in the end ,turns out to be a boy.

i'm planning to turn him into the first trannycat though, i'm going to sing Cher/Madonna songs and surround him with glitter and high heels. not the best way to raise a cat, but if he takes the bait, he's gonna be a sistah real soon. :)

..tickled by the minute hand too. my laptops telling me i've got 20 minutes before the battery dies, so this is gonna be quick.

i've been getting panic attacks. cabin fever is the pits. i've been holed up in my room, barely talking to anyone (much less seeing anyone), i wish the exams were over and done with already. its only thursday. fat chance.

and i miss Cat like crazy.

have i blogged about my black and white lazy furball yet? i got her for my birthday, present from the jeffcat. i swear i need a cat break. she's siamese and has blue eyes. i gotta get good vibes from something who won't speak and just rub against you. (disadvantaged people don't count).

i want this shit to be over. i'm jittery. so jittery.

Sneaker Pimps: Waterbaby

Your heart is served cold
Your sights are set in perfect stone,
And when you go you go alone,
And when you stand you're on your own,
I wash the streets from your skin when you come home

We're nothing like friends,
You have no time to lend,
And if you're guilt then I'm the shame,
And if I'm hurt then you're the blame
You wash my trace from your skin and you leave again

Random laid plans, 40 days of one night stands,
And when you go you go alone
You walk the cross you made your own

I wash the streets from your skin when you come home

 

the bell jar just isn't as fun when you've got stockholm syndrome. i sound like karl. not. good.